I was promised, by her and my parents alike, that if we showed up to every get together, for every holiday, that my grandmother would come around to my being gay.

So we did. 
For seven continuous years.

KP and I came to every Easter, Christmas and major family milestone (for other people).
We endured the hour-long drives. 
The embarrassment of never being acknowledged. 
How none of the topics we discussed were ever engaged.
The complete devaluation of everything we liked and were.

Those trips were labor. 
Unreciprocated labor and gaslighting, because homosexual acceptance was never on the table — only my complete and total obeisance.

I often forget how the first border-wall I ever built was internal of my biological family.
I had to build the wall on my own grandmother, for my simply wanting to have a wedding ceremony.

(I gave her a one-year deadline where we could talk about it openly.

I showed up each time, but she didn’t.)

#Poem #Lent #Easter #CheckedTheTomb #ItWasEmpty

#MakeTheFamilyGreat #ClarityIsKindness #ThanksDanSavage#KuhnFamilyTraitor