About three years ago, we were at a friend’s wedding out in the county. At some point, we were telling a group of straight men how excited we were to be going to an upcoming Gay Pride festival. One of them starts debating with us whether there even is a need for those anymore.

Something along the lines like “Gays should be happy they got marriage, and I don’t want to see them celebrating when I’m out and about.”

This morning, he sends me a three-page message apologizing and explaining how I wasn’t understanding what he was saying. It’s been weighing on him how we left things. 
But I have a rule, for me and for my family, we don’t need to console abusers’ feelings of guilt and remorse for treating us like garbage. 
Because that’s gaslighting.

You feel bad? Good.
You apologized and I was emotionally withholding?

I wonder where I learned that from.

#Gaslighting #BordersAndBoundaries #BuildTheWall#KeepItCuteOrPutItOnMute 

#InvisibleLaborRedirection #Lent #MaleTraitor#FamilyMeeting