I am actually facing an intellectual crisis in this process, y’all.

I’m going to stop posting until I get word from women and other queer folk that this project isn’t an unnecessary drain / colonizing of their care and attention.

I totally didn’t consider this venue being an unconsentual process for people viewing it! Its been hugely helpful and healing for me, and I thought my insights into successfully building a gay marriage in a Trumpian environment might be beneficial in others’ path to liberation. That is an assumption; I am uncertain now, though, that it has been an unfair ask of everyone involved?

I am a man asking women / queer people / women of color for labor. Period.

You need a say.

For me to have the de-colonized, egalitarian family that exists in my head — I need the go-ahead from the people whose labor I am implicitly demanding by doing this in their view!

I have weight others don’t being a gay white man! My family must be a republic!